So…

I finally had my ADHD assessment yesterday. It was after social services finally sent the information to my psychologist, who then sat me down and did the assessment interview. It took place in a tiny poky office with bright, white walls. It felt very surreal, and didn’t help that it was first thing in the morning when the event took place. I finished my bottle of water very early on, and needed the toilet for a while.

Three hours, and an awful lot of questions later, my life changed forever. ‘Yes, that’s a positive diagnosis for ADHD, more on the attention deficit part than the hyperactive, but you definitely have ADHD.”

It was a strange moment in my life, when my questions about my life were answered, when I realised why I wasn’t a typical autistic woman, why I struggled so much as I got older, why I couldn’t cope at college or when I started university. It was a mix of relief, as well as dread, as it means that the way I live my life will be completely different. I’ll have to create new strategies, potentially change my diet/go on medication to manage my condition.

But now I know why I find lectures and seminars difficult, and why I can’t seem to follow routines, as well as explaining the anger that I feel sometimes, and the feelings that I have that swing from one to the other at the drop of a hat. I know now why I struggle to sleep properly at night, and why I spend every day exhausted by life.

I’ll hopefully be seen by someone in Bristol soon, to discuss options for potential treatment of the condition. But for now, I guess I have to get some actual work done…

Last Day of College… EVER!

Today is the very last day I will ever spend at college. I have had to give back my macbook as a result, which means you might not hear from me much, which is sad.

I’m therefore writing this post on one of the Student Union computers in the office, and am hanging out with my friends in the office for the last time, which is sad. I want to organise for us all to go to lazer quest at the dockyard, but everyone wants to go airsofting, which sounds painful. At least with lazer it won’t hurt…

I’m going to miss them all, and the fact that I won’t be going into college to see them will be a tricky thing to deal with for a while. I’m hoping that we can organise D&D sessions outside of college, although finding a venue will be difficult, as there are at least twenty members of our college group (we’re all geeks and prod, you know). I know that they are a mad bunch, full of innuendo and general craziness, but that’s why they are awesome really, and I will miss them, ever so slightly.

So, tomorrow I’ll be going to work, then it’ll be my mother in law’s 40th birthday bash (mustn’t get too drunk!) then I have work again the next day. Monday I go up to Bath to visit the university that I have a conditional offer from to discuss my accomodation and learning support options.

But, for now, I shall enjoy my last day here by watching the weirdly sexual videos that my DM is playing and winding up Tim about everything.

My Final College D&D Session

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(From knowyourmeme.com)

So, you guys might be aware that this week is my last D&D session at college, as I sign out of college for good on Thursday… 

So, I decided to pop up this meme that I found. This is mainly because of the fact that my college classmates teased me about my new found hobby. I might do one of the nerdiest things in the world, but I love it. 

Not to mention that my friend Badger is DM tonight, and I just lopped off his other testicle (Inside joke!). That’s going to be a barrel of laughs! Considering that Josh killstole in the last chapter of the quest, most of the dragonborns and elves will loath his character, and his human wit just won’t work on us. My elf hates his character, which is brilliant! 

I’ve also got some black arrows, but I can’t remember what they do, extra damage, I suppose, from the last chapter. I wonder if anything exciting will happen today?

So, Maybe Not the Last Day…

Just had my tutor lecture-crash…

And he’s told us that we don’t sign out until Thursday. I saw one of my classmates who had a sleepless night trying to get everything done for today look darkly at him as he gave out the announcement.

For me, though, I am rather happy with the situation! This means that Wednesday I can actually spend bashing out all the left over assignments that I have left to do, which is alright…

 

Last Day Jitters!

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(Picture from quicklime.com)

Yes, tomorrow it is The Last Day of College. Ever.

And I haven’t touched my dossier or my coursework, even though I did have plans to do so. That means I have only tomorrow as a day of lectures left to get EVERYTHING done. And I mean everything. Tuesdays I have off timetable anyway, and I’ll be at work sniffing rope (not as bad as it sounds, seriously!) so won’t have time to cram. Then I’m going to go into college early to hog a computer at the LRC in order to get everything else done by 1pm, so I can hand it in, sign out, hand the Macbook back to college (no more typed on a keyboard blogs for ever, as I won’t have access to a decent PC for a while), collect my deposit (my college makes you pay out £25 at the start of the course) and LEAVE FOREVER!

The sad bit is that I’ll have to leave my college D&D group, shame it didn’t get started until later in the year. I’ll have to see if there is a group in my area that I can actually sort out my hobby, although they might do things a lot differently, which might suck. Oh well…

So, am nervous, but hopefully I’ll pull through.

Now, where did I put that locker key?

Catch-Up

So, as you can see, my cosplay has been unveiled! I’ll be looking into the Femme Arthur Dent next, so stay tuned for that! I got my bow tie through the post yesterday afternoon, which I was able to intercept as work let me off early!

I didn’t realise that yesterday was one of those days where I didn’t actually need to go into work. I could of sat down and started some coursework, but as I left my memory stick over at my fiancé’s, I’m going to have to wait a while before I can finish off the theory side of things for college, but I’ll probably take the day off next Tuesday after the opening weekend rush in order to sit and get some serious work done. I might even head off to college and sit in the study centre a while, but, meh.

Today I’m going to be visiting Southampton with my housemate and our carer today, it’ll be the first visit of the year, which is pretty exciting, as I haven’t been since the Christmas shopping. One of the reasons I rarely go there to shop is because it’s a one and a half hours’ journey by bus to get there in the first place (Winchester is two hours!), and the bus to the city isn’t very frequent, so you need to have a full day out in the city, it’s not somewhere where you can go to for a couple of hours and then go home. It’s also a place that gets pretty crowded when the weather is good, as they have a massive shopping centre, an IKEA and a very busy high street. It’s not particularly fun, but there you go. The crowd issue causes several issues, for example, long queues in some of the stores, people stepping on either you or the shopping and generally getting in the way. I tend to get most annoyed at the mums with huge buggies, which act like those snow plowers (and most of the time their kids are not even in the blinking thing!), and they expect you to get the heck out of their way! I understand it when a disabled person needs the room, but not these mums who use their buggies as trollies…

Rant over. 

Anyways, I’m really excited about tomorrow as well, as I’m going to be doing a filming gig for work. As the new museum has all it’s opening stuff going on tomorrow, they need people to help the film crew out. As I have training in filmmaking (thanks college!) I’ve been asked to help out. Only downside is that they will need me in Southsea for 8.30am. Looks like I’ll have to be up with the sparrows, as I need to get a bus from my house to Gosport, get the ferry over to Gunwarf, and then hop on another bus to Southsea. It’s a once in a lifetime thing though, so it really is something to get excited about!

And then on Friday will be a massive work do! We’re all going to this party that will have a DJ, live music, food and drink, just some really cool stuff! It’ll be a long one as well, so how I’m going to get off the base at 10.30pm without a pass is beyond me! 

Then Saturday and Sunday will be the opening weekend to the public! Scary stuff! I’m really nervous, as I know it’ll be the busiest weekend in the history of busy weekends. As a volunteer tour guide in the new museum, my job does involve crowd control, as well as talking to the public about the artefacts and other stories to do with the museum, and I also have to do security checks for unattended items. 

And then back to college for the final full day…

Half Term!

So, tomorrow heralds the start of the final Half Term break of this academic year! For those who are non-UK, half terms are random weeks that we school/college students get off, where we get the entire week off to do as we please before going back to education the week after. This is why we don’t have longer school holidays like in the US. But I digress. 

After this week off, I only have to go into college for one final 9-4 day of classes, and then I sign out of college forever! This is why this half term for me is actually a lot more special. It’s also because when I go to university, I will never have a half term ever again, as universities set up their own holidays rather than linking to the way the government organises this time. It does mean I’ll get longer breaks though, such as longer Christmas and Spring break. 

So, you must be wondering about what I’ll be getting up to, what I shall be doing with this final half term? 

This past weekend I’ve had off of work, as the museum opens to the public museum, so I’ve been vegging in front of Jeremy Kyle and CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. Hopefully I should get my hair dyed (I have my usual dye and some bleach for the fringe) Tomorrow will be an early start, 5am to be precise, as I am (with Josh’s help) selling a load of my stuff at the local car boot sale, and will then write up the Geeky Feminist post (Doctor Who, very cool). Tuesday is one of the days I’m on shift, so from 9 to 5 I’ll be at the museum, then I’ll be going back home. I believe that I’ll be popping into Southampton on either Wednesday or Thursday, as I would like to get hold of some D&D dice (I need my friend to send me the DM guides) as well as to have a look into a nice dress for Thursday and Friday. Thursday evening is the opening ceremony for the museum, which I have been invited to, along with the other volunteers and staff members, which is exciting. I’ve also been asked to take notes so I can write a ‘dummy’ blog post for a potential Mary Rose blog, so that will be nice. I’ll probably spend my spare time studying, as well as making sure I can attend the open audition for ‘The Importance of Being Earnest’ at the theatre near the museum. I do have my dossier to still do, as well as some essays for three different lecturers. I will have to make sure that everything gets done before 3rd June, when everything is due in, before I sign out on 5th June. Friday is the work do to celebrate the museum being open at last, which will be exciting. Then I’ll be working the opening weekend with the usual hours, and I bet it’ll be the busiest I’ll have ever worked. 

So, that’ll be my half term. 

If you’re having half term this week, what you doing? If you could have a whole week to yourself, what would you do with it?

 

Time Flies…

I still recall being a young year seven student at the local special needs secondary school having my first lesson from our tutor. He told us, “Now you are young adults, expect time to fly by. The slow and happy days of childhood are far behind you.” The other kids didn’t understand what he meant, after all, most of them could barely write their own names. But I understood, although I perhaps didn’t believe him. How could time possibly fly?

So, I battled through the horror that was the special needs education system, one that focused on those more ‘disabled’ and leaving us more able students struggling with being bullied and at risk every day from being beaten to a pulp because restraining isn’t allowed unless the victim is at risk of severe injury, or being locked in a classroom alone if you confronted the teachers about the system you loathed. Time stayed at a nightarish slow pace, and I prayed for some sort of escape route, anything to help me leave that godforsaken place.

And the mainstream school next door offered me that green ticket of freedom. They were opening a new ASD section to their learning support, and needed a test subject. I was the perfect candidate, and I started that summer in 2009.

That was when time opened its wings and took off.

As the retake of year 10 and the GCSE period of year 11, followed with prom planning and choir auditions continued, as well as a relationship with one of my classmates blossomed and then soured, I saw time pick up the pace.

And time sped up when I started college. It only feels like yesterday when I sat in that room with the people I would have to work with over the next two years. And now, today, I am handing in my FMP film. Half term will involve me working both on my coursework, and at the museum, then on 5th June, I leave college forever.

That teacher was right. Time sure does fly.

It’s (Almost) Summer Time

So, now for a lovely frivolous post! 

I like writing random posts, I do it quite often on my spirituality blog, and thought it would be nice to do it here too. I mean, it’s nice to make friends with the writer behind the screen.Image

That was me at that fancy dress party that I mentioned in this week’s geeky feminist issue post. I know the neck is awful, but I was rushing to get the make up on, especially as I was a bit of an idiot and didn’t do a makeup test run prior to the event. I’ll have you know I was the only Elphaba there, everyone else went as Grease people!

Anyways, my time at college is almost up. It kinda hit me this morning as I sat there in class in a rather dejected manner. I edited the footage that I got for my FMP film yesterday, and made notes about what I need to have filmed tomorrow, for example, I accidentally missed out part of a sequence for a scene, which means that I will have to film that part tomorrow, which is a bit of a bugger, but hey to the ho. I will then spend the rest of this week editing everything until I am happy with it, before handing the project in on Friday. Then all I have to do is do all my coursework over half term (I am still behind on a serious amount of stuff, not the most ideal scenario) on top of going to work, and then I sign out officially after half term (for the US readers, in the UK we have ‘half terms’ where we get random weeks off, but it makes our proper academic holidays shorter. This only happens at schools and colleges though, universities don’t have that luck).

Then it’ll be SUMMER!

I remember saying to myself aged seventeen when I finally left school (I was pulled back a year because I switched schools three quarters of the way through Year 10, one of the most significant year groups of secondary school), that the summer following it would be the BEST summer I ever had. It was a long summer, ten weeks off! Ten weeks of doing naff all, apart from the occasional heartbreak when a guy dumped me because his parents hated me for some reason, and the various family trips that bored me to tears. I remember buying new stationary, a new backpack, new clothes. I was going to be a whole new person.

Nothing changed really. All that changed was the environment and the style of study, not to mention the classmates. The past two years have been great though, I met Josh, I figured out what I’m going to be doing with my life (sort of), I’ve got new life experiences, lots of great experiences that have helped shape me over the space of college education. 

I would have to say that this year was more eventful than last year. This is because I felt more confident to actually sign up for the SU, which I didn’t feel I could do the previous year as my foster mum didn’t approve of me doing anything outside my studies, which took me places. Literally. I got to go to York for a few days for the NUS Women’s Conference, which was awesome! I get to organise some wicked events, like on Wednesday, I’ll be hosting an Amnestea party in the college’s restaurant, which is pretty exciting, as we’ve never run an Amnesty International event before! 

And, after all that, it’ll be summer.

What on earth will I do with myself? 

For one thing, I’ll be writing. I’ll write this blog, as well as my usual writing. The only issue is that after I break up from college, I’ll have to blog from my Kindle Fire and write into notebooks, as I have to give this laptop I’m currently using back to the college as it was only on loan for the duration of the year, as my old laptop broke down. So you’ll have to bear with me on that one. I’ll also be knitting the blanket I’m making for university, it keeps my fingers busy. I’ll work on my cosplays, and will carry on working at the museum. I will hopefully go to London and other interesting places too this summer, but who knows? 

I guess I’ll have a lot of time to kill.