I was thinking about this as I set off to my second lecture of the day, not long after posting the blog post I wrote this afternoon. So, without further ado, I shall make a list of flatmates you might well come across at university…
The Clean Freak
This is the person who, whenever you see them, has some form of cleaning impliment in their hand, and is often moaning about someone leaving their dishes on the side, or complaining that no one has taken out the bins since last Monday. A great person to be around if you don’t know where the launderette is, they’ve probably been there at least twice this week.
The Social Butterfly
This flatmate is lovely, kind, funny and bubbly. You’ll mostly find this person talking to everyone, making sure they spend quality time with each person. They are always happy to listen to everyone’s problems, and is a shoulder to cry on. They also can be found organising parties/activities in order to keep everyone feeling good, not lonely.
The Calm One
This person is the calmest person you know! Seriously, you’ve never seen them stress out,or look sad in any way whatsoever. When someone/thing has annoyed you, it is guaranteed that the calm one’s nature will soothe the redness of the crossness.
This person you never see, if you do, it feels like they silently slip in, then vanish without a trace when you turn round and realise they are there. A mystery, really.
Now, this is a treasure of a flatmate to have, seriously! This person is someone you know will understand your every quirk, every joke, every story. They’ll be the one to advise you on situations, and be ready to disagree with you in the best way possible if needed. A genuine person, someone you want to be friends with even after the year of living in halls.
The Flatmate From Hell
We all have varying degrees of this type of flatmate, so here are some <shudders> sub catagories, and how best to put up with them:
This variation is the person who will annoy you with everything they do, be it leaving dishes on the side because they think that you’ll put them away for them, insist that they talk to you non stop when all you want to do is have your dinner then leave. This flatmate causes you to eat in your room rather than in the communal kitchen. Best thing to do is to ignore them, if they do try to engage you, be very, well, dismissive, using one word phrases causing them to realise you’re not interested,
The Incredible Hulk
Now, this is a terrible being to behold. Seriously, you don’t want to hang around this flatmate. God help you if you use the kettle that is theirs, because it boils quicker, or borrow one of their mugs when a friend visits because you don’t have any spare ones, or even decide that, now, you will discuss a movie you want to see with a friend, when they are talking about their favourite wine. And don’t you dare enter a competitive activity with this person,or allow them to drink. Really, this person will shout and scream at you, with far more aggression than is possibly required. They will take being competitive FAR too seriously, and will fly into a rage if they do not win. My best advice is, if you see this flatmate coming towards you, make excuses and LEAVE, especially if you want your eardrums to remain intact. Or, if you’re braver, use the same tone of voice as they do when they speak to you. Maybe a taste of their own medicine might work. But it might be safer to just avoid them.
The Royal Highness
Right, combine Irritation and Hulk, and you get the Royal Highness. You also get with this ultimate flatmate from Hell arrogance, a middle/upper class background, snobby attitude when you tell them you would go out to the pub for a roast, but you can’t afford to because you don’t have an account with The Bank of Mum and Dad, or whether you ask him if he’s actually going to and find a job like everyone else is. If they don’t like what you think/say/are, then they will tell you, all Hulk style, and be insistent that they are right, and you, the mere mortal peasant, are completely wrong, and you must have their views in order to be accepted into society. Unfortunately the only way to deal with this flatmate is to seriously avoid them like the plague! (I have experience of this particular flatmate, they are very unpleasant to live with.)
And, that, dear readers, is my list of flatmates! I hope you enjoyed it, I enjoyed writing it!