It’s Been a While…

It’s been ages since I wrote a post for this blog.

I’ve been terrible at keeping you all updated in everything I’ve been up to. Catching up with a load of backlogged coursework, running Pagan Society, writing a novel and general living. But I thought I’d give you a run-down on how it’s been.

I did get one book for Christmas, from M, an anthology of love poetry, which was cute! Other than that, I got some nice presents from my aunt and paternal family. It was amazing to spend Christmas with my own biological family, which I hadn’t really done since before I was put into care. But the past is in the past, and we move on.

So, things are progressing with my ADHD life. I’m now on maximum dose of my medication, and it is actually making the world of difference. I can now, once it has properly kicked in, sit down and blitz a load of words down. I’ve even been able to start a novel!

Tonight I’m off to help out to prepare with stuff for tomorrow, as I’m taking part in my first ever Reclaim the Night! Can’t wait! I’ll write more about it tomorrow, as it’s going to be amazing! I’ll write it from a neurodiverse point of view, so it should be informative!

I should be posting a lot more often than I have been, I’ve missed you all!

Books, Books, Books…

They are a major part of my life. I’m not even kidding! When most women buy wine and shoes, I purchase books and tea, maybe some cosy jumpers too…

I saw an article about books affecting relationships, and about these two women’s reactions to books changing their relationships in various ways. I thought I’d respond.

I’ve even gotten into fights with partners over my reading habit. My ex told me I should stick to the TV, he did so happily, so why was that an issue? That sucked. I’d buy him books for Christmas, and he’d pretend to read a chapter before sending it on to a charity shop a week later. Another partner disputed my choice of reading material (“do you read anything post classics era? You know, published recently?”). And one moaned when I started reading Chris Ryan novels so I’d fit in with his literary discussions on the playground.

But I fell in love as a result of reading. When Matt was staying over one time, in my old halls, I had to leave him for an hour as I had an appointment with my mentor. When I got back, he was curled up with a book. He wasn’t even disturbed by my entrance, as I kicked off my heels and shimmied out of a little dress to climb back into bed. A man who reads is a man I shall attempt to be with forever!

And, we talk about books all the time! We go through the set novels on my lists for university, as well as general books we loved as children, teenagers, young adults. Even books we read for pleasure get discussed and reviewed verbally, exploring themes and ideas of the writers, coming up with our own theories.

I’m just hoping I get books for Christmas!

The Eve of ‘Adulthood’

Tonight is the final night of my 20 year old-ness. I, Heidi Street, will be an official grown-up. I’ll be of the American legal age to drink alcohol, and will be (hopefully) less likely to get ID’d when I purchase alcohol or painkillers.

But I’m already an ‘adult’ in the eyes of the law, right? I’ve been of the age of majority since I turned eighteen, been legally allowed to drink, smoke, vote, marry without parental consent, leave foster care. I can enlist into the armed forces (if I were not autistic or mentally ill).

I know the only other addition to my rights as of tomorrow is that I could adopt if I want to. At the moment, I’m at university, so I’m unable to adopt at this moment in time. Other than that, nothing will really change.

When you turn twenty, you stop being a ‘teenager’, but because of the society being used to the age of majority being 21, that’s when people start to truly see you as an adult.

Another point I’d like to make is about the new rules in certian local authorities with their ‘Staying On’ projects, when young people can stay with foster carers until they reach 21 years of age. I agree with this, although I think that even at 21, you are still not ready to leave home, these days, for various reasons, young people don’t leave home until their mid 20s, so to expect young people in care to live 100% independently at 18, or even 16 in some cases is completely abhorrent and wrong.

As I turn 21, I realise I’ve been failed by the system. And that something needs to be done about it.

Life’s… Getting There

Trigger – I talk about my sex life a little bit in this!

So, I’ve been back at university for two weeks now, and it’s been interesting.

I’ve gone through two university provided wheelchairs (both were broken, annoyingly), But the university has hired out an electric scooter for me, so that’s made life a bit easier, though it doesn’t help that none of the buses used on the 15 route are suitable for scooters.

After a visit to the GP about painkillers, the conversation turned to my antidepressants, and he asked me if I was still taking them/whether I felt they were working. Now, after my trip to the hospital, where the nurses refused to let me take the pills I had Matt bring in for me. I realised that they weren’t helping me at all. Not to mention that I’d realised that the side effect I was most irritated about was the fact that I’d, well, lost the ability to come to orgasm. This had happened a few weeks before the accident, where sex happened many times, but I was a lot trickier than normal to satisfy… It just stopped happening, and it was beginning to upset Matt that he couldn’t do much about it. It’s not your fault, I soothed, but I couldn’t figure out why until I looked at my medication’s side effects. So I carried on after the accident not taking them, and my sex life did improve.

So, I awkwardly mentioned this to the GP, and because he didn’t want me just not on antidepressants, he changed me over to prozac. Because of my sleep issues and the pain in my leg not helping, he also added sleeping pills.

Yesterday I took my first dose. Then I had an episode for the first time, where we were in a group for my seminar, and we were generating characters for a story, in a way that involved saying an idea, and just using it without being allowed to debate it. I felt so out of control, and trying to get this across to both my classmates and my lecturer caused me to nearly burst into tears. I never cry over something as trivial as that, and it freaked me out. I called Matt straight afterwards, and we agreed to pay attention to my emotions for the next two weeks to see if it is the prozac causing this or not.

Today has been better though. I slept in all morning, so felt much more refreshed, I’ve had a shower using my new Lush shower gel, and when Matt gets here, we’ll be off for a Cards Against Humanity session with the girls at their place. It has been a much better day, much more relaxed.

So, I’m hoping to do a few things this academic year:

1) Set up a new blog dedicated to reviewing Lush and other beauty products/fashion from an autistic perspective

2) ACTUALLY WIN NANOWRIMO THIS GODDAMN YEAR

3) Get some Firsts in my uni work

4) Get my act together as a functioning adult…

First Week Back!

So, I’ve finally finished my first week back in classes! I’m currently celebrating with a sneezing fit in the IT room as I type up this entry. Yes, I’ve heard a titter or two already coming from fellow inmates/students as I wonder why the hell it’s kicking off now. Maybe I’m allergic to studying?

All jokes aside, it has been great to be back doing what I love to do, that is, being in the academic environment, being in a routine once again.

Not to mention that there are some really interesting classes this year, compared to last year, with journals in Writer’s Workshop 2, in which I can get away with writing about the obcsene poems inspired by Ginsburg, and talk about not reading but screwing (sorry Matt!), reading picture books in Writing for Young People (Where The Wild Things Are, fabulous!), reading chick lit in Genre Fiction (even when a girl complains how deeply offended she is by the term ‘chick lit’, calling it highly mysoginistic, and that we should be banned from reffering to it as such, even though the industry itself refers to books as such. What do you lot think? I’m not overly fussed!), and writing poetry to be yelled at in Performance Poetry. I’ll admit that I did skive Sudden Prose to go to my Comedy Society session, but after an email from my professor asking me whether I’m still in the module or not guilt-tripping me, I’ll have to drop Comedy for a bit. It’s only for one semester though, so I can chillax.

So, it’s been a good week, other than realising that using a manual wheelchair to get around campus is an absolute nightmare, especially when your lecture/support session is at the top of a hill, or the postroom has been moved to a completley inaccessable spot on campus. In the next week, I’ll be writing an official blog post about my experiences as a person who is trying to get around in a wheelchair/crutches in and around Bath and Bath Spa University, and how I feel that things could change for the better in the way that people are being supported and assisted in these situations.

In the meantime, my laptop is back to normal now the malware’s off, I’ve got a journal to update, and Matt is over tomorrow, so I need to tidy up as much as I can! Woo?

Officially a 2nd Year!

Today I crawled out of bed, and wheeled into the main academic building to sort myself out academia wise. I’ve had to switch a module due to health and safety, so that was easy to do, then I actually had to enrol.

It’s official, I’m a second year creative writing student! I’m taking Writing for Young People – Reading as Writers, Sudden Prose, Performance Poetry, Genre Fiction and Writer’s Workshop 2. My timetable looks to be pretty darned packed! Not like that’s a bad thing, I like to be kept busy, and this year I am determined to be an excellent student, but it’s going to be an exhausting term, what with the leg and all.

I was going to have an electric scooter to get around, however student support (bless them) couldn’t get it to work, so I’m using a manual wheelchair to get around. Later in the week, I’m going to talk about my experiences in a wheelchair in more detail, as you realise that you take so much for granted when you’re mobile!

In the meantime, I’m off to the Freshers Fair later this afternoon, that’s after the Second Year Creative Writing talk I have to attend (should go get some pens and a notebook for this academic year in a bit), and tomorrow I have a hospital appointment for my leg and the Liberation Rep stuff to do in the afternoon!